The Kurdistan Region

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How is the Kurdish Region of Iraq for mongers?

 

Is there any prostitution activity example street hookers, bars with prostitutes or massage parlors offering erotic services?

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many

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Do you have some more information?

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The Secret Lives Of Iraqi Kurdistan’s Gay Community Slowly Emerging

Source: Narim Rostam niqash.org

 

Shirin Qureshi: In Iraq, a conservative society means most gay and lesbian locals have to hide their sexual orientation. (photo: محمد رحمن)

Thanks to a conservative local culture, almost all gays and lesbians in Iraq keep their sexual preferences secret. But recently, the topic has been discussed more openly in Iraqi Kurdistan.

For decades, Kurdish people living in northern Iraq, who were attracted to the same sex, have been living secret lives. While some of Iraqi Kurdistan’s cities might be more open in some ways, in general the society remains conservative and homosexuality is a major taboo.

Although local authorities do not have any rules about homosexuality being illegal, most Muslims in Iraq believe that religious laws based on Islam do not condone same sex relationships. Often gay and lesbian Kurds end up getting married and living in a traditional heterosexual relationship.   

That doesn’t mean that an underground gay scene doesn’t exist though. Judging by social media sites and various Facebook pages, there are plenty of gay and lesbian individuals in Iraqi Kurdistan. It is just extremely rare for them to declare their sexual orientation openly. Most use anonymous avatar-style pictures and pseudonyms to participate in online communities.

However more recently, there seems to have been a shift in attitudes, albeit a minor one. There are still many misconceptions about what being gay means, but a more open conversation appears to be starting in some sectors of the local community. For example, a number of better known locals have started speaking about homosexuality openly.  

"I am not a homosexual, but I support them with all my strength,” says Wahid Nazad, a singer from Iranian Kurdistan who now lives in Erbil. “As a defender of their rights, I am always attacked and often insulted - but I don’t care.”

In June 2017, many in the community took note of the fact that Shirin Qureshi, a 26-year-old originally from the Kurdish part of Iran, told Voice of America’s Kurdish channel that she was a lesbian.

It may well be that Qureshi is one of the first Kurdish women to do this, speaking openly about her sexual orientation while also giving her real name and showing her face. Then again Qureshi lives in Germany, where the culture is far more accepting of the lesbian, gay, bi-sexual and transgender, or LGBT, communities.

“I certainly don’t feel bad about being a lesbian, it’s just normal,” Qureshi told NIQASH. “But in Kurdistan I was forced to hide this because society doesn’t accept gays or lesbian. There are a lot of us in Kurdistan,” she confirms. “But we live in fear.”

Arina is the assumed name of a 24-year-old university student living in the Iraqi Kurdish capital of Erbil. She believes she is a lesbian and had her first sexual experience with a female relative recently. But now, she says, she doesn’t have anyone to talk to about it.

The only place Arina can find information is on social media and it is here that most of the discussion and socialising goes on.

Astera Karim is an Iraqi Kurdish woman living in Sweden. She has become well known among Kurdish speakers for her YouTube and Facebook broadcasts where she will often tackle topics that could not be talked about so openly back home.

After talking about body image one day recently, Karim received many messages from Kurdish-speaking gays and lesbians in different countries.

Karim told NIQASH she was surprised to get so many messages as she had not realized there were so many LGBT community members in Kurdistan.

There have been other positive developments. As Middle Eastern news site, Al Monitor reported earlier this year, two of Iraqi Kurdistan’s major TV channels broadcast shows about difficulties the local LGBT community face. “While both programs had some shortcomings, it was nonetheless brave of the journalists and the channels' managers to address an issue that many see as taboo,” the journalist wrote.

But just because some people are expressing support and openly discussing the issue, that doesn’t mean it is safe to come all the way out.

Recently Iraqi Kurdish director Hayman Khofiya submitted a movie on the subject to a film festival in the city of Sulaymaniyah, which is generally known as the most liberal of the major cities in Iraqi Kurdistan.

“But it wasn’t accepted,” Khofiya explains. “The selection committee told me that such a film about same sex activities would not be appreciated by the general society. It’s not like I think everybody should be gay. But gay people exist, and we should not condemn them.”

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LGBT community fear living openly in Kurdista

A wall in the city of Sulaimani, Kurdistan Region, displays art and a message of co-existence. File photo: Rudaw

ERBIL, Kurdistan Region — Imagine living a lie. A life of lies, secrecy and often depression only to conform to cultural norms so that you or your family isn’t endangered or murdered.

This is the case for the LGBT community in Kurdistan. Many have gone through their life living under a veil of shame, pain, resentment and confusion because of who they are and not “what” they were taught to be.

Many people in Kurdistan are often surprised to find out that an LGBT community exists here while others actually believe that there are "no gay people in Kurdistan". Others believe it's a sickness that can be cured with medical, psychological, or spiritual treatment, which logically isn't the case.

LGBT communities do exist in Kurdistan in all ethnicities, religions and cities, and some of them have removed the veil of silence and secrecy to be heard.

Farshid, a 32-year-old man from Iranian Kurdistan now living in Europe, said he was about 9 years old when he realized he was “different.”

"I was nearly 9 when I realized that I had a different sexual preference,” said Farshid. "It was complicated in the beginning. I only knew that I liked men and I had no feelings about women. I continued living with a feeling of being ashamed. Due to religion and Islamic law, homosexuality is a big sin and crime and the punishment is death.
 

"Living in a Muslim country I experienced a life full of shame, fear, daily stress and low self-confidence because I was living and carrying a mentality that my family and society gave me. It was so difficult that several times I thought about suicide. But the only thing that kept me from doing it was my love to my mom and my family."

"Despite living in a free country now, it's still difficult to accept myself and realize that I have the right to live as any other human being because I have a different sexual preference," he added "I blame this all on the society that I grew up in."

While same-sex sexual activity is technically legal under Iraqi Penal Code which applies to the Kurdistan Region, the LGBT community often come under harsh scrutiny in a conservative, religious society where preferring the opposite sex as a partner is still taboo.

David, a 25 year old accountant and Arab from Baghdad who now lives in Erbil, detailed how he was attacked twice, once for being suspected as gay in Baghdad as well as in Erbil.

"In Baghdad, some street boys suspected me of being gay and they attacked me, hitting me, kicking me and tearing my clothes off. In Erbil, I was sitting in a car with a friend kissing when some men came from out of nowhere and attacked us. They beat us for an hour and a half. We pleaded with them to leave us alone and not report us to the police. We were still taken to the police and had to sign a pledge not to repeat the offense,” he detailed.

David explained of stories he's heard of Iraqi police officers arresting gay men or those suspected of being gay who were imprisoned. As soon as they were released they were killed by their families.

"They were killed by being beaten with building bricks on their heads and other brutal ways," he added.
 

In general, most people within the LGBT community say they feel relative safety, but only because they work hard at hiding their sexual affiliation.

 

Others live in constant fear, with Aziz, a 19-year-old Kurdish student from Duhok living in Erbil saying: "I personally don't feel safe at all, this place likes to dictate what people say and how they think and you will get punished or killed by the authorities if you publicly defy the system."

 
Aziz said his family doesn't know for sure if he is gay, but one family member who suspected it threatened to "bury him alive.”

Aziz thought he was going through a phase when he was 13 and liked having sexual interactions with other boys because it was "somehow more accessible" but the feeling grew stronger as he got older and he now finds himself in a place where he wants to have a mutually loving long-term relationship.

Mahmoud, a 32-year-old Turkmen working in education from Kirkuk also fears for his safety.

"The danger comes from the community and their anger about being gay because there is no law to protect us from being killed. That has happened many times to men and women. That happened last year to someone I knew," he explained.

Everyone who spoke with Rudaw said some of the biggest challenges faced by the LGBT community is to hide your sexuality and pressure from their families to get married and have children or getting used to being alone.
 

Nasr, a 24 year old company manager and Kurd from Sulaimani living in Erbil said that there is pressure not just from the family.

"The society discriminates against unmarried people generally, gay or not," he said. "You can't even live anywhere in peace if you are not married. They even discriminate in governmental establishments."

Nasr realized he was attracted to men when he was around 8 years old. Growing up in a religious family and being religious himself as a teenager, he felt shame and intentionally hurt himself wanting to redeem himself from what was believed to be a sin, to a point of contemplating suicide.

Women in the LGBT community in Kurdistan often have a harder time talking about their sexuality than the men do.

Neem, a 34-year-old healthcare professional and Kurd from Tuz Khurmatu living in Sulaimani said she was scared when she realized she was attracted to both men and women.

"The biggest challenge for me as a bisexual girl is telling a potential partner that I'm equally attracted to men and women," she explained. "They usually think that I'm not loyal or I'll eventually leave them for the opposite gender."

Blue, a 17-year-old Kurdish girl from Sulaimani realized she had an attraction to girls when she was around 11. She said that she didn't think it was a big deal at first but realized it could be dangerous in this society.

"I've had people try to "make me straight" and I lost my best friend of nine years once she found out I'm a lesbian," Blue said, adding that if her parents found out, "I'd definitely be killed."

Noor is a 20 year old student in Erbil originally Arab from Baghdad who is bisexual.

"I tried to deny for a long time but after falling for a girl at 15, it was impossible to deny it after that so I decided that I am who I am, that I should love and accept myself for who I am," she said. "Now I've fully accepted my sexuality and I'm even proud of it. You are who you are and you have to love and accept that self."

Noor also had a message for other people who may be struggling with their sexuality in Kurdistan that mimicked the advice of others interviewed.

"No matter what anyone tells you or criticizes you or even if they send you hate messages for being a part of the LGBTQ community, remember that you're perfectly normal. Nothing's wrong with you no matter what anyone ever tells you. You should be able to be your true self and love it,” she said

 

Foreigners also struggle with the same issues as others in the local LGBT community and have to mask themselves to blend in.

Jason, a 29-year-old analyst from America said he was around 12 years old when he realized he was gay and when his family later found out, he was kicked out of his home.

"Fortunately, my family is not going to kill me. That is a real threat for some people who are from here. However, my danger is ensuring my life progress is not interrupted. Being too public could ruin my career opportunities," he said.

However, he explained how it is easier for males in Kurdistan to meet and date.

"Because we live in a gender-segregated society here, it is easy to travel together, go out together, and even rent rooms together as two men, he explained. "People scrutinize a man and a woman or two women alone much more.

"However, two men enjoy a lot of social freedom without being assumed to be gay. This gives us a general freedom in Erbil, surprisingly more than In the United States. In the United States, there is a huge stigma to friendship and closeness between men and everyone would assume we were gay (and attack us) if we were there."

What does the LGBT community want in society?

"We want you to know we are everywhere. Maybe at your home as a brother or sister maybe at work as your coworker or at your school... So please accept us. That's all what we want," said Mahmoud from Kirkuk.

Source Rudaw By A.C. Robinson 29/1/2019

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19 hours ago, amykavali said:

can you please tell me availability escort services or lesbian travel services in erbil or near by

There are no official escort agencies in Erbil. How ever you can find escorts from TINDER. if you are in another country at the moment, just change the location with tinder plus and check the Erbil girls available!

Another one is WeChat app. Sometimes you can find sex workers with that in many countries. Off course if you have local buddies in Erbil or you talk to a taxi driver who speaks english, he will help you most likely.

 

Lesbian scene is not very open as you can read from the previous posts I wrote!

Also tinder works very well when searching lesbians while travelling! Another good one is couchsurfing (this is a secret travelling app which works for hookups). Just make a profile there. Mention you are a lesbian and put a public trip to Iraq, Erbil in your profile and see if anyone contacts you!